It’s very difficult to constantly self-motivate, especially when you’re walking through long-term unemployment. It will be two years with no full-time job at the end of January for me! Yikes! I simply cannot keep myself optimistic without help. I have to constantly call friends and keep in touch with career contacts to feel like I’m still a part of the world.

Why not write a list of five people that you can call? Make sure that they’re ‘safe’ – by that I mean non-judgemental, good listeners and positive. I don’t find it helpful to talk to someone who runs through a list of jobs I could be doing as it just tends to depress me. Trust me, if it’s even marginally related to something I can do or have done, I’ve applied for it as I’m sure you have too.

So, five people… Keep that list handy, so that when you find yourself particularly discouraged you don’t need to think about what to do. Just make a phonecall.

Keep the phonecall brief – don’t get into complaining (no one likes to listen to that). Simply say you’re having a hard day and are really frustrated and hearing (your friend’s) voice always cheers you up. Chance are, you’ll hang up feeling happier and able to continue your day.

Why not give it a try?

Slow down.

Slow right down.

There’s a great saying, “anything that has to be done right away, probably doesn’t have to be done.” While this doesn’t apply to surgeons, for the rest of us, we can ask ourselves, “how important is it?” Will your relationship with your mother be permanently severed if you don’t get her the right gift? Will your boyfriend/girlfriend stop loving you if the holiday dinner isn’t just so? If the answer is ‘yes’ then you have more troubles than getting the perfect gift, but for most of us, the answer is ‘no.’

Is this stress you’re putting on yourself really worth it? Why not slow down…breathe…have something to eat and re-evaluate things. You may find that when you do a solution to whatever you are fretting about pops into your head. If nothing less, you’ll be in much better spirits and actually able to be present for the ones you love.

So when you notice yourself willing to give up your peace of mind and heart for something that doesn’t involve saving another person’s life, take a breath and slow right down.

I am at the end of my unemployment again – I qualify for another extension, but it’s hard to not lose all hope. I cannot believe that I haven’t been able to get a job in all this time.

So, for today, I am applying to jobs and looking up quotes on hope. I have to believe that it will turn around as we all have to.

For me, I’ve survived a year (two years really) of unemployment without being committed to a mental ward (it’s been close).

I’ve been willing to show up to life on life’s terms and not feel too sorry for myself.

I’ve worked really hard on having a good attitude, even when circumstances screamed otherwise.

I’ve been willing to look at my belief systems and uncover (with help of course) things that stand in my way of the way I’d like to be in the world.

I’ve begun writing – something I’ve been putting off for a long time.

and, of course, there’s more to list.

What’s on your list?

I realized that I don’t like to be generally angry. I don’t mind specific anger or irritation regarding a person, but I don’t like walking around in a general state of anger. So, for today, I am going to try to be angry at my situation and at God.

I am pissed off that this has gone on for this long and hope to never have to go through this again.

Do you have emotions that you have been avoiding because you don’t like the way that they feel or you’re afraid that you’ll become overwhelmed? I’ve been told that ‘you can’t die from your feelings’ so why not explore what you’re bottling up. I am doing the same.

I have an appointment with a recruiter on Monday, so, fingers crossed that she can place me somewhere. I want to work!

For me, all around my apartment are things that bring me stress – from my bills, to my computer where i do the majority of my job-hunting, to my fancy work clothes that I haven’t worn in eons… Going out of town helped me to feel like circumstances could change. Laying by the pool forced me to rest. I wasn’t able to job-hunt or return phonecalls or plan what I should do next. Most of all, it was nice to be around good friends – I can’t think of a better way to escape the confines of my headspace.

Maybe you think there’s no way that you can justify getting away right now. But, for your sanity, why not look into a mini-vacay. Even if it’s just driving somewhere close and staying the night at a hotel. You might be surprised at how much you really needed the change of scenery.

So, right now, I’m up for a job in England. Crazy, right? I can be considered for a job in England but not get interviews in California. Which leads me to today’s topic – why not expand your job search area to include other states and/or countries that you like (if you don’t have children/spouse who can’t relocate).

I’ve lived in England before and liked it (although I am a California girl at heart), but maybe it’s where the next phase of my life is supposed to begin. Be willing to open your mind to places you wouldn’t have considered before (good places)- you may find that the rest of your life is waiting for you there…

Even if I don’t get this job in England, it’s been absolutely lovely way to occupy my brain with thinking about relocating there, what the job would be like, etc… Sort of like when you buy a lottery ticket and think of what you would do with the winnings.

Friendships are for better or worse – be willing to let someone comfort you or encourage you or cheer you up. Think about it – if your friend were in your situation, you’d want to be there, right? So, give them the same opportunity.

Tonight, I’m having dinner with friends – we are all rallying because a dear friend had a family tragedy and needs support. I’ve found that just being around people you love and who love you can make everything feel better for that span of time. Let the people who want to carry you on their shoulders until you’re able to walk again.

I have found it to be very true. You certainly can’t achieve something if you don’t start it. Is there something you would like to change in your life? For me, along with many other internal things I am working on, I wanted to lose some weight. I have begun being more careful with what I choose to eat and adding in some extra sit-ups. I was surprised to find that I had lost half and inch off my waist! hooray!

I have so little control over when this unemployment will end (obviously, I’m actively job-hunting, networking, going to mixers, seeing recruiters, etc.), so it’s nice to be able to work on something I can influence.

What simple thing would you like to be different in your life? why not use today to start that transformation?